Having a purpose-driven life.

It's funny how life sometimes brings you back into the life you used to have, back to the things you used to like, back to things you used to do. I guess internet makes it easier to get back to it. It's nearing 2020 and as I was browsing through this blog, I was reading some posts and realised that nothing much as changed. I mean of course I have matured (a bit), I got to know myself a bit more and am less insecure than I used to be. But one thing my 'old' me has in common with the 'now' me is the urge to find my purpose or passion and somehow I end up always having to write about this. I feel like this will clear my head a bit and bring me a step closer to my purpose. Maybe a small recap off my current life is necessary to get to the point of this post (not even sure that there's a point), but I have been in my head a couple of days now, whether to write stuff down for once, after reading a bit about 'ikigai' (finding one's purpose).

So back in 2016, I kinda stopped writing when I was living in Taiwan and that time I was doubting about my career choices. I finished my Bachelors, but was in this (what I back-in-the-days referred as a) 'quarter-life' crisis. Looking back, I might have been a tiny bit overdramatic, but it was what I was feeling at that time nonetheless. And maybe it was necessary to come to the point of where I am now. I went back to do my masters in Strategic Design, with renewed excitement. I felt like a step closer to my purpose or at least felt like I got my life together. I had a blast during my studies and learned a lot, mostly about myself, but also careerwise. Now I'm a recent graduate and back to the point of how I felt during 2016. Maybe not to that extreme, but feeling a bit wonky about my path. I keep on being obsessed about knowing and finding what my purpose is, and have all these ideas of where I could be and could do. I like so many things and am interested in many things, but is it something that's worthwhile exploring? And because of all these ideas, I'm stuck doing nothing. I'm also feeling inpatient. Am I the only one feeling like this sometimes?

I've been researching a bit on this idea of 'finding your purpose'. And if you've read some of my previous posts, I have been doing this for a while now. And I came across two ideas that really struck to me and left me feeling a bit more grounded and guided. 

1. I found this on @Thefuturishere instagram about making your passion your work. It talked about a Dr. Steven Tomlinson asking the same question to one of his advisor. "I love business, I love economics and I love the theatre. Which one should I pick (for my career)?". His advisor replied "that is the STUPIDEST question anyone has ever asked me". "Don't discard the three things you love. This is not how things work. You might not end up with a career, but you will end up with a life. Find a way to keep all three of these things in the mix. Let them talk to each other." - From the podcast "Stealing like an artist with Austin Kleon -Part 2.

2. I also recently discovered the term 'ikigai', also through TheFutur (seriously they are my lifesaver). It's about finding one's purpose. I think unbeknownst to myself I have been doing this throughout my whole studies. It's about combining things you love, you're skilled at, what the world needs and things that pays.

These two things seriously helped me not feeling alone in this and also help me realise that liking many things is okay and I won't be needing to discard any thing. It's all about balancing the stuff. The funny thing is that I know I should be actively doing one of these things I mentioned, but instead I felt the urge to write about it. Maybe writing about finding one's purpose is in 'the mix of things I like/love' and maybe even something that 'the world might need'. *Fun fact: My master thesis was about purpose-driven brands.*

I hope with this post I at least help someone out there with the same struggle as I am going through. I know that this post is a bit all over the place, but I felt I needed to write this down, unedited.



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“Where does a thought go when it's forgotten?” ― Sigmund Freud

So it's been a while, in fact it has been over a year already since I've updated this blog. And I've decided long ago not to be focused too much on what this blog used to be, fashion/lifestyle blog or whatever you would call it. I've noticed that actually posting about fashion, makes me lose my own sense of style. You always want to be up-to-date with the latest fashion and keep up, but when is the time for refining your style? Ever since I don't have the urge to post something new about the latest fashion, I am more aware of my own sense of style, what I like and don't. But the one thing that I truly miss, is the writing. I miss the outlet that I had with blogging of just writing. Believe me at uni, I do a lot of writing but I guess I just miss writing about my personal life and all that sorts of talks that big adults should think about. Some would say "Just get a freaking dairy, nobody cares". And it's probably true.. But there's something that's truly alluring to me in giving your thoughts a place on the internet for anybody to read, to misinterpret, to disagree, or to do anything about it. I just enjoy it. I find it often hard to express myself verbally, I can start telling stories from B to A to never even mentioning the C. My thoughts are always everywhere, which is sometimes super frustrating for people around me but especially for myself. I learned to deal with it better by time, but one of the ways to get my thoughts in order is by putting it out here.

For the fashionreaders out there, I'm probably going to post less about the latest fashiontrends and more about personal things that I find important. And really more about discovering, developing and understanding myself and people in general. In case you haven't been busy doing it, it's time to start! Let's follow the journey together. 


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PERSONAL | six months later..

Hi guys! So it's been a while.. it's been six months since I've posted anything here.. 

I've been back for a few weeks now and I think it's time to reflect on the past six months.

Even though I was planning to document and keep this blog up while I was in Taiwan, I didn't really thought about it or had time for it, which is a pity but also something I needed to take a break from.
Not that blogging has been a full time thing, but sometimes it's nice to take a break and come back with a new fresh perspective on my blog. I had more time to focus on my Mandarin and what I really wanted to do after my time is done in Taiwan. That part is still a bit blurry but I've come to realise that I missed uni and what I want to be doing in the future. Also I realised how much I enjoy being behind camera, taking pictures or making videos. I might be focusing on that part more since I still have a lot of pictures of Taiwan that I need to edit. Another exciting news is that I'm moving out!

So I'll be spending most of my money on interior stuff or furniture and so on. I've been planning to do some DIY for my new room, which I might post online! 

Till the next post!

x J.

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QUICK UPDATE | Happy 2016!

It's 2016! The year went by so fast. 2015 has been good to me, I've finally got my Bachelor's, I did some travelling and met some new cool people, but I'm definitely ready to get into new stuff in 2016. 2016 will be more about finding what I want from my life and experiencing new things. Me being in Taipei at the moment definitely contributes to it. One thing that I've figured out is that I miss designing and using my creative side of the brain. I also want to make more videos in 2016 and do more for this blog!



HAPPY 2016!

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VIDEO | VLOG #2 Visiting Maokong, Taipei

Finally it's here! a second vlog! This vlog should've been online about two weeks ago, but due to some 'technical' difficulties (my laptop wouldn't recognise my phone) it was delayed.

So two weeks ago I went to see Maokong in the Maokong gondola. The gondola is known for their transparent cabins, the crystal cabins. You'll be able to see below you while riding the gondola. So you have a great view of everything. Since it was nice weather, my friend Christina and I decided to go see this after having our morning coffee. It was such fun and I'd recommend it for those who are visiting Taipei to get a perfect view of the city. 

Enjoy this beautiful view with me in this vlog!

x J.

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PERSONAL | Having faith

This is going to be a post that is (maybe too) personal for me. I wrote this post two weeks ago but never posted it. I thought now that time has past and things are settling a bit, I'd share it with you.
It's something about having faith. Some of you may or may not know that I often go to church. Maybe not every week, but I still consider it often. When I go and pray, I pray for all sorts of things. I pray for my family and friends, for the people in need and so on. I often do a quick prayer as well, I must admit I sometimes do a quick prayer for a good grade because I didn't study enough before a test. When you're alone in a foreign country, living abroad especially in a country where they don't speak English and they don't use roman alphabet, you tend to feel lonely and that's where you turn to praying. In my case, I was in the church. I prayed for courage and strength. Courage not to be afraid to ask and talk to locals despite not knowing the language. Courage to be able to live alone. Especially, courage to believe in myself. Courage. Courage. Courage. I remember saying this word (in Dutch) over and over again in my prayer.

Later that day, I went home. I really didn't feel like doing anything. I just want to stay locked up in my room watch some Youtube and just stay inside till the next day despite the lovely weather outside. I didn't even feel like getting some food. Everything was just a bit overwhelming. I got exhausted of trying to figure things out on my own. I was on my laptop and I can't even remember why but I picked up my LonelyPlanet book of Taiwan. I was just skimming on it and then I stopped and read 'Taiwan Design Museum'. I immediately had this urge to go. I just had to leave my place, even though it was already 3PM and it closes at 6PM. I packed my bag, grab my camera and left. I was there within 45 minutes. The museum was okay. It wasn't so big and half of the exhibition was something I've already seen, so I was done within an hour but at least it gave me a bit of my energy back.

But it was that temporary exhibition of GQ that brought me back again. This exhibition wasn't part of the museum and was a building apart. I didn't know beforehand. As you may have already seen in the video. It was about dreaming big and who you want to be. It was very inspirational. There was this wall. It had all those weird buttons on it, about 20 or so. This girl explained to me (mind you in Chinese, I just nodded with my head as she showed me) that those are all different stamps. You have to pick one out of the 20 buttons without knowing what it is and stick a piece of paper in it. She gave me one paper. On the strip was written 'What do you need?'. I chose a button, put my paper in it and pressed on it. I didn't really think of much when I was doing this.

I pulled it out of the button and read 'courage'.

It could be just a coincidence or it could be something else, but at that moment nothing felt greater than reading that piece of paper. It could've been everything but it decided to be the one word I needed to hear. It was a reassurance I needed that I'm not alone on this and that it all will be okay. I can say now everything's brighter and a lot more fun! I kept the piece of courage in my daily planner as a reminder for myself that I am capable and everything is possible if you just have the courage.

click read more for the pictures

x J.

PERSONAL | I am not a label

Usually I don't post about these kind of topics but I felt it was important to me enough to share it with you guys. Enough about that famous instagram model, who I've never heard about before she supposedly revealed social media secrets.. Talk about what really matters. I leave my thought about that matter in another post maybe. What I really want to talk about is this video I've stumbled upon on Facebook. You know when something just clicked. You just keep nodding your head because you completely agree with anything that's been said. This is what Prince Ea did to me with this video about 'labelling people'. It's something that's been bothering me a while.

I hate it when people have this prejudice against a certain label. Like when people ask me if I eat rice everyday because I'm Asian, I mean would that person be asking that if I was a caucasian? But what I hate the most are people who pity themselves for being a certain label. They feel offended for every criticism they get and blame it on their 'label'.  There was this interview about a new movie, the 'white' producer said to the 'black' interviewer that it was important to have a diverse cast for the movie but not necessarily in the crew. As you would've guessed. People were all going mad about what he had said. The interviewer responded with "Wow, ok", was clearly offended and people on twitter were already bashing on him. But if you listen closely and just let him explain a bit more, it's actually logical. You shouldn't base your crew upon racial diversity, but you should base it on skill. Who wouldn't want to have the best director or scriptwriter regardless of their race. The only thing that needs to be considered is to give everyone a chance to apply for the job.
People get so easily offended and are so touchy about their labels that it's sometimes hard to reason with them.

At first I couldn't put my annoyance into place. But after watching this, it suddenly was all clear to me. It's the labels! I hate being, using labels or even thinking in labels. It's hard not to do so, because we are already so used to it that it's almost impossible not to. Almost, which is why this message is so important. Labels won't go away within a decade, but as cheesy as it sounds, it all starts with changing yourself first. It won't be easy and probably something to easy forget. But try to remember before you judge someone, is it because of their own 'me' or is it because of their 'label'. Or just repeat this video over and over again so you'll be reminded. Seriously though this video is on point.

Imagine what great things will arise if we put labels behind us.

If there were no labels to hold us back. No label to define us.


What do you think of this message?


x J.

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PERSONAL & OOTD | Finding Marie Kondo

I have a lot of clothes. Not surprising really, my parents know that, my friends know that, my wallet definitely knows it and of course you guys probably know it as well with all the hauls I'm posting on the blog. But enough is enough. I've been feeling suffocated by the amount of clothes I own. And I've noticed that my wardrobe didn't make me happy anymore but just makes me confused and frustrated in the morning. As I'm getting older I also noticed the types of clothing I prefer and certain looks I want to achieve. I also want to achieve a more minimalistic lifestyle. It certainly doesn't help achieving it with having garments in my closet that I wore in high school. It will give me a clear vision for my style by detoxing my wardrobe.

So last sunday (my only day off) has been about decluttering my wardrobe. My intention is to do my wardrobe first and work on other stuff phase by phase. At this stage I'm quite pleased at the amount of boxes (read the plural noun) I'm getting rid off. I know a lot of bloggers and Youtubers are doing a capsule wardrobe or the project 333. Now I'm not going to follow that (all though I think it will be fun to do it for a month or so) because I know that it's not something right for me (maybe in the future). I like to have some choice in the morning but the main problem I have with my current wardrobe is that I feel that a lot of garments aren't "me" anymore. And just be smarter while shopping. A method I'm going to apply is the "Konmari" method complied by a Japanese woman named Marie Kondo. Now I haven't been able to read it (I'm going to asap) but I've watched a video made by Youtuber Lavendaire. She really explains the method well and really inspires me to do this as well. So now I'm done with procrastinating and just decluttering everything! Marie just has a really beautiful and metaphoric way to describe the steps she takes on how to say goodbye to your stuff. She sounds really delicate and such an inspiring woman. So I'm definitely going to purchase the book. It's called the "The life changing magic of tidying up". Wish me luck.
I've added the video of Lavendaire below. If you're interested go check it out!

The outfit I'm wearing is pretty basic and super casual since I wasn't planning on going anywhere but just tidying up

bomber | VILA
Jeans | Primark
Sneakers | Nike

x J.

PLOG | Little thing called regret

Today I went to Rotterdam to do high tea for my friend's birthday at 100m high. Which isn't really high compared to other buildings in countries like the States but here where almost everything is flat, it makes quite a nice view. I was quite surprised at the pastries we got, it was quite good for the price of €19 and was satisfied. It got more expensive though when we entered the Euromast, you have to pay €9,50 to enter the exhibit. The entrance fee made it not worthy (I'm a cheapskate). That's why I was so bummed out afterwards that I didn't film anything to at least make the most out of it. I forgot my camera because I was in a hurry and was already running late. I didn't think of filming on my phone at that time.. 

But things happen and I tend to get too hung up on that sort of things. Like I shouldn't have said that instead I should've.. Blablablaa. It's kind of frustrating that it keeps on running in your head and you can't really help it, so that's why you have to write this post at 2AM. And this is just another case of something called regret.

So the lesson I've learned today is to never forget to bring your camera.

Yes, even if it's going to the bathroom. (Just kidding..don't bring it inside, it makes people uncomfortable. Unless you use your phone as a camera..)

To make me feel better here are some pictures of today. 

Have you ever experienced something similar as well?

xJ.

PERSONAL | Real Talk

I thought I share with you a piece of my mind right now, what I've been going through and 'partly' the reason why I'm not so often blogging anymore. And maybe something people can relate to.

There's one point in your life that you either have already dealt with or probably going to in the (near) future (or maybe not for the lucky ones). I call it the quarter-life-crisis. I'm dealing with it right now. After I graduated from my bachelor's degree, I started thinking about what I wanted to do next. Usually you continue with the master's right after you graduate from you bachelors. At that point I started to question everything. I felt like I'm doing these things because it's what the rules are and what people expect me to do, but not something I know I want.

Something I can use to reach my goals.

But what are my goals? What do I want to achieve in my life? What's my passion?

I've been struggling with this my whole life maybe not as 'deep' as that but it's in the little things when I need to make decisions in my life, not life decisions but small stuff like what to choose from the menu or what shoes to wear. I've always been the hesitater. And it's become so far that I start doubting myself in everything I do. Another thing is that I like to do pretty much everything from sewing and designing clothes to setting up my own foodtruck. Combine both things and you get a hot mess alright. What you get is me telling 'I want to be an illustrator' one day and 'I want to design furniture' the other, without doing something really about it. Not going after it is probably the worst thing I can do, cause you definitely fail if you don't even try. But I still want to find something that I truly feel passionate about.

So how do I extinguish 'liking to do something' to 'following my passion' ? I've been reading this book by Po Bronson called "What should I do with my life?" (yeah how more accurate can it be?), it's a book full of stories about people who have faced the same question. One story stuck with me. Noah has been struggling with finding what he's passionate about. He had ten jobs in 8 years spread over six cities in four different states. He believes that everyone has a unique gift to give the world, so what's his? Where is his passion at? He asked this question to the author and the next thing the author said is something I find inspirational and something I can hold on to.

"Some people are born into their passions. Some never get them and don't care. But I think if you're really struggling to find it, it's almost certainly for a reason. I think the depth of your struggling, is the sign there's something there. Something in you that's trying to get out."

It's okay to not have everything figured out yet, but it's something I need to keep looking for. Try something else, do something new, meet new and interesting people.

So what now? I almost don't dare to say it, because then it's official and something I really have to go after. Okay, here it goes. I'm leaving for Taipei. As in Taiwan, as in a different continent, as in a different culture, as in a different language for at least three months (probably six months). For some it may be nothing really, but for me it's scary as hell. I've never really lived alone and never been far from my family and friends, so doing this is a big step for me and I believe that it will do me good. I'm planning to study Mandarin there beginning from December, but I'll have to be there mid November already. So a lot of stuff to arrange beforehand and I hope everything will go as planned. I'll still be posting here about fashion but I'll include my journey to Taiwan as well.

Have anyone of you struggled with this as well? And how did you deal with it?

x J.

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Outfitpost | HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In about 2 hours it's official.. Goodbye 2014 and hello 2015! It's weird how fast a year can go and but I'm actually happy to close this chapter and head into a new chapter (sounds cheesy, I know).
This year I've learned some new things about myself and how I want to become as a person and I think that a new year is a great start to gain a step closer to my goals.

Anyway, this outfit is not my NYE outfit, but just an outfit I wore two days back. It seems to fit NYE though. For a semi-formal gathering with friends and family. The flowy top is perfect for hiding that belly you just gained from Christmas and the silver boots gives the outfit that bit of spark that fits NYE. 

Thanks for putting up with me this year through this blog. I hope you had as much as fun as writing posts as you reading it.. May next year bring this blog to the next level and more for you to enjoy!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Lots of love,

xJ.

Top | COS
Pants | Pieces
Boots | Primark 

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GRWM | Fancy Christmas Dinner

My friends and I always gather around to celebrate christmas each year. And this year we decided to have a fancy dinner (by fancy, I really mean fancy..). We went to an Asian fusion with French cuisine restaurant to have a 5-course meal, which was more 8 courses if you asked me. Even though the check was a stab in my heart it was worth the money to spend the evening with friends. 

I wore this blue laced dress by Forever21, I have been eyeing this dress for a while but was still hesitating because it was originally priced 30euros, which isn't a lot for a dress but I wasn't sure if the dress would suit me. When it went on sale for 17euros, I immediately put in the online shopping bag, I guess when things go on sale, my previous doubts were gone. Fortunately it fits and I received the dress along with some other stuff just in time for dinner. I knew I could rely on the superb fast shipping time provided by Forever21. (I don't get paid for saying that) 

What are you doing around this festive times?

PS. I didn't have time to take pictures while I'm actually wearing the outfit, but I will do a three-festive-outfits-post I wore around the festivities. So stay tuned for more festive outfits.

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GIFT GUIDE | Smartphone gadgets

It's that time of the year again.. Christmas songs on the radio, all kinds of decorations around the house and if you live in The Netherlands, you'd see 'oliebollen' stands on every corner of the streets. Oliebol is a Dutch/Belgian pastry, which taste a bit like a doughnut, made around new years eve. It's my guilty pleasure around this time of the year especially the ones filled with raisins.

This time of the year is not all about food, although it plays a huge part, it's also about giving.
Giving each other love and of course presents, lots and lots of present. Presents are definitely not only restricted to kids and youngsters, so here's my little Christmas gift guide for us supposedly 'adults' or try to act like one for that matter. These gifts are specifically for the smartphone.

Smartphone Virtual Reality Viewer by Dodocase

This is probably one of my favorite gift to receive myself (or I could just steal it from my brother), my inner geek for gadgets comes out with this. It's a kit to build a VR viewer out of cardboard after you download the app on your smartphone you can start using it right away. Put your phone in the viewer and enjoy the experience. I've played the one where you sit in a rollercoaster and you actually feel yourself moving with it. This kit costs 20 euros.

Selfie stick or selfie remote

This is probably the most used maybe even gained a 'negative' reputation word of this year (or was it last year?), but it still is very useful for those who like to take pictures while traveling or while they go somewhere. There are lots of selfie sticks around but those ones with bluetooth is definitely the best ones out there. Just sync and pair the stick with your phone and your good to go. I think this definitely would be useful in concerts where you want to film the performer, especially if your as short as me. You can get it almost everywhere online, but if you're in a hurry and in need of one right away, you can buy it at HEMA for 12 euros.

Sometimes you want to take a picture of yourself and your friends at a great distance, that's where the selfie remote comes in handy. You download the remote cam app and the camera responds to the sound the remote makes by pressing the button. The reach is not that big though, probably somewhere between 3 and 5 meters. You can buy this at HEMA as well for 10 euros.

That's my gift guide for this year. I hope to have helped you with finding the right gifts for your loved ones!

What do you think of these presents?

xJ.

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PERSONAL | Cozy days in

It's getting colder by the minute and this weather is making me want to stay in to drink a cup of tea (or hot chocolate my guilty pleasure), wrapped in a blanket and get lost in another world. I love to read books and if you ask me to choose between shopping or reading a good book, I'd probably end up doing both at the same time (multitasking, yo). I totally see it happening. But since I only have limited space in my room and buying books is a pretty expensive hobby, I have been reading ebooks.

The latest book that got me totally hooked on is called 'A thousand pieces of you" by Claudia Gray. I just have to share this with you guys. It's the first book out of the 'Firebird' trilogy. This book is a good mixture between sci-fi and romance and since it's a young adult book, it's probably a bit immature for someone of my age.. but hey a good book is a good book. And boy.. Look at that cover?! How pretty is that?

Anyhow, this book is about a girl named Marguerite who is the daughter of two physicists, who created the firebird, which is a device that makes travelling between alternate dimensions possible. Read the full synopsis here. At first I was scared that the book was too complicated and too sci-fi'yi but ms. Gray executed this quite well by making the narrator (Marguerite) explain the finer details of the effects of the Firebird and make it actually really believable.We've all had that 'what if'-moment in life where you just wonder how your life would turn out to be. Another version of yourself living a different life because in that dimension you decided to study for that test instead of going to that party, how awesome is that? 

I personally don't really like reading sci-fi books but this was kinda cool. I can recommend this book to readers who loves the Hunger games trilogy and maybe even Twilight trilogy (I didn't like Twilight myself though).

I have to warn you though, the next book is expected in november 2015. So if you're excited about the trilogy like me, you're basically screwed by the longg wait.

What books can you recommend?

x J.

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PERSONAL | Back from the dead!

Yes this post is about Halloween and yes it's also about me returning from the dead to blogging!

Since I'm a big fan of the Walking Dead, it isn't too difficult of a decision what I wanted to be for Halloween. A 'walker' ofcourse! Or a zombie as they call it as well. But since I was so busy with my uni the past couple weeks (more like months) I didn't really have time to prepare my costume for a Halloween costume party. So I decided to be a Farmer Bob 'walker'. And I must say it's not bad for a 2 hour work of magic! And glueing toiletpaper on my face to make wounds never have been so much fun.

Did you go out for trick or treating?

Anyway, my lonely days in the library till 12AM are gone and my hands are itching again to do some blogging and working on some new projects. Good to be back :)

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Personal | My love for food trucks

If you follow me on instagram, you would already know how much I love food. I don't like to label myself as a 'foodie' but I do like to get extraordinarily excited when it comes to trying out new places/food. So you can probably guess how wild I got from all these food trucks that are finally coming to the Netherlands (at least in the big cities). They even got a few trucks on my campus, which is so bad for my wallet and waistline. Anyway, these pictures were taken at a Food Truck Festival TREK in The Hague a while ago. But I was/still am obsessed with these food, that I occasionally look back to the pictures. It was such a good time, with good food, music and people! Can't wait to go to a similar event again.

- J.

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Disney fun

A few days ago I went to Paris, France with a couple of friends to go see EuroDisney! I haven't been there in a while so it was nice to visit it with my friends. I had a blast and the weather behaved itself. Here are some pictures of my trip, mainly of my outfit in Disney. It is the one and almost only time where you can go all childish without being inappropriate. So I opted for a cropped shirt with dungarees and to top it off wore some minnie mouse ears. How much more Disney can you get?

x J.
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Personal | Pretbord! for HEMA

As I've already said in a previous post. I got nominated for the HEMA design competition, I can win a sum of money and on top of that it can be produced! In order to win, I need votes! So what's my design about?

PRETBORD (in Dutch it means funplate)
A plate for kids to eat their meal with veggies in a fun and creative way.
The mother can slice up the ingredients and the child can create their own artwork. Because the child engages with the food, they will become familiar with it and will most likely eat the food sooner.

You can vote for me here:
http://hemaontwerpwedstrijd.nl

The voting ends 13 July

Don't forget to confirm the vote on your mail!
Thank you so much and wish my luck!

J.

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